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In Memoriam Mary Casey Forry 1944-2004 Founding Publisher, Dorchester Reporter Boston Irish Reporter Boston Haitian Reporter Mattapan Reporter
IRS Determines 501 (c) (3) Status
The big launch party at the Boston Harbor Hotel on October 16 was a wonderful success. Some 300 persons joined the Forry family in a festive evening to celebrate the beginning of our efforts to raise funds to establish a hospice residential home in the Dorchester/Mattapan/Milton neighborhood. We were honored to be joined by Governor Deval Patrick and Mayor Tom Menino for this first public event, and our emcee for the evening, WBZ-TV channel 4's Lisa Hughes added just the perfect touch to our event. Thanks to all- especially the Boston Harbor Hotel and the Pyramid Hotel Group. its CEO, Rick Kelleher and his staff for their wonderful hospitality and generosity. Also thanks to Bill Brett, photographer extraordinaire for his generous efforts to our foundation. In the next few days, we will post some photos from this great evening, as well as more information about our plans. Again, thank you, thank you, one and all. We are deeply honored by your friendshipand your support of our vision to establish a meaningful memorial to our beloved Mary! - The Mary Casey Forry Foundation
October 16, 2007
Honorary Committee Mayor Thomas M. Menino Susan J. Asci Contributions may be made by mail to: Mary Casey Forry Foundation, Inc. 501 (c)(3) Mary Casey Forry was a gifted columnist with our family newspapers. To read some of her writing, follow this link.
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Mission Statement Mary Casey Forry, a spouse, a mom and a grandmother, was founding president of Boston Neighborhood News, Inc. and publisher of the Dorchester Reporter, and a gifted writer whose "Urban Gardener" columns delighted scores of readers. She was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer in February, 2003, and lived with the disease for 22 months. Announcing the publication of a new book by the Boston Irish Reporter's Peter F. Stevens, Hidden History of the Boston Irish from The History Press
True stories
about Boston's Irish, from September, 2007 By Ed Forry "Pray for a happy death." I remember those words from the nuns at St. Gregory's school those many years ago. I imagined then that they had something to do with a "state of grace" as the "hour of death" arrived. All this was far from anything tangible to my then-youthful sensibility and certainly something I was more than eager to put off thinking about. The fact is that to the young, death is something to hope to avoid, or at least to keep out of the consciousness. The D word can cause anxiety and great fear. The notion of a "happy death" is the equivalent of speaking in a foreign tongue: incomprehensible, unimaginable. And so it was, almost three years ago now, that I approached the final days of my wife, Mary, who had been living with pancreatic cancer for almost two years. As summer turned to autumn, and the disease began to overwhelm the chemotherapies, our doctors called the family together to say they had done all they could, and now it was time for hospice. Hospice -- a word to shy away from, to avoid as if somehow by denying the term we can avoid the death. But despite the anxiety, we soon came to understand and to prize the near-miraculous effects of the hospice care for my dying best friend. It became a lifeline, the palliative, empathetic attention helping so much to prepare us, the family and her, the patient for her death. And her last days, coming at home, in her own bed, with her family and house pets at her side, and caring visits from hospice nurses and volunteers, home health aides, and relatives and friends made those final days bearable, civilized, and, yes, peaceful. Hospice is one of those words that you don't want to hear or think about -- until it's necessary to do so. Then comes the discovery that when a loved one is facing death, hospice care is, ironically, a lifesaver. Our family was fortunate: We had our own home and healthy caregivers able to go the extra distance late into the night and early in the morning. And we could support each other, as well as our dying spouse and mother. When she took her last breath, just after 8 a.m. on that early winter morning, I watched the sunlight break through her bedroom window and stream onto her now-still face. It was as if her soul was flowing along that beam of solar light, right on up to a new afterlife. "Your wife is an angel now," said the hospice nurse. It took me a few moments to comprehend what she meant, but then I knew, and I understood that our prayers had been answered. For 22 months, we had fervently sought both medical and divine intervention to extend her life, and she stayed with us. Over those last few days, we knew that she was ready to leave us, and we had prayed she would not suffer and struggle any more as her time approached. Our prayers were answered: For Mary, her passing was what I had long ago been told to pray for, a "happy" death. As a family, we were privileged to welcome hospice into our own home. But in-home hospice care may not always work, for many reasons: an older spouse may be unable to care for a partner, or the extended family may not live nearby, or there may be no close family or friends available to ensure a death with such dignity. Our family has resolved to establish a residential facility that can be shared by people in need. It is called a "hospice home," and it will have a dozen or so beds, and each room will be large enough for a loved one to share, even stay overnight, while a trained staff will be on duty around the clock to provide the necessary palliative care. There are several such facilities -- in Needham, Cambridge, on Cape Cod and elsewhere -- but none in Boston. Our hope is to establish a hospice home in the Dorchester-Mattapan-Milton area, a place where persons in need can spend their final days "close to home." For our neighbors, it would be a place to die with dignity. In our vision, it will be a home with a kitchen, dining room and parlor, and, in Mary's memory, flowers, lots of flowers, indoor plants and outdoor gardens. And maybe even a house cat. We intend to call it the "Mary Casey Forry Hospice Home," and we hope to raise the funds to build it, and then to partner with a hospice provider to sponsor and manage it. Photographer Bill Brett and the Boston Harbor Hotel have offered to host a book-signing event on Tues., Oct. 16, with all the proceeds going to help us establish the hospice home in Mary's name. Thanks to their generosity, the event will be the first big step toward realizing our memorial. Your help is welcome, dear reader, as we begin this family project. I welcome any suggestions and comments, and I will keep you posted on our progress in the Reporter, Please contact me by this email link. |
